My marriage is very important to me. Did you know that parents of special needs children have a high divorce rate? The stresses that come with it can easily tear couples apart. I do what I can to protect mine by scheduling time with my husband and by studying the bible and listening to what God has to say about marriage.
I'm currently studying the book of Esther. The beginning of the book introduces us to King Xerxes and Queen Vashti. Xerxes had invited a bunch of nobles and military leaders to their home in order to show all that he had obtained and his strength in leadership for 180 days! After the 180 days he held a banquet for these men and his wife Vashti held one for their wives for 7 days. Near the end of the 7 days Xerxes, being inebriated along with all of his guests, summons his wife. She refuses and he turns furious. Looking at who was invited and what was going on during this time, we are under the assumption that this party is a political move to prove his strength and worthiness to conquer other lands. So, when Vashti refuses, not only is she showing Xerxes disrespect, but she is also terribly embarrassing him in front of his guests.
Looking at Vashti's point of view, it is possible that Vashti may have been fighting for her dignity by refusing Xerxes summons. Are we to fight for our dignity or humble ourselves before God? As wives, we are the queens of our homes, but our husbands are the kings. It is in our best interest to submit to our husbands in obedience to God. If it is in our power to submit to our husband's requests (that are in line with God and/or are non-threatening) then we should do so. God will bless us and bring justice to any wrongdoing done toward us.
It is possible that the bad advice that Xerxes takes after Vashti's refusal is Xerxes' punishment for summoning her the way he did. Just as it was Vashti's punishment to be banished from the king's presence and a new queen chosen in her place was her punishment for disrespecting her husband in public.
Colossians 3:18 says "Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord."
Ephesians 5:33 says "However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband."
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Introduction
Many of us have different roles in our lives. My more prominent role in this life is that of a mother. I have a wonderful little boy who happens to have an autistic spectrum disorder. He is so very smart and I am so amazed by him everyday. I've always wanted a child of my own but didn't think I could get pregnant. So it was a real shock when I saw the two red lines. I had thought that I was just coming down with a bug. The nausea had lasted for two weeks before I took the test, but I still hadn't believed it to be because a baby was growing inside of me. Although it became a struggle fairly early in his young life, he has been a complete blessing in ours.
Just a few days ago, in the early morning hour, in the midst of dozing and falling into a deep sleep, I was reminded of a difficult time in my son's behavior. It was after his diagnosis and before he officially started school. It started small. He would consistently line things up. He seemed to be searching for some type of order. Then it moved on to him lining up two or three of our dining room chairs. Soon he was lining up all of our dining room chairs, and before we knew it, he was lining up every single chair in our home down the center of the house! After learning how to teach him through behavior therapy, I knew what I had to do. I needed to be strong and not allow the lining up. Any time he would move a chair away from it's original spot, I would immediately put it back, without a word. At first, he would laugh nervously. After some time, when he realized that I was going to continue putting chairs back, he started to cry and whine. After a month and a half of this-every day, several times a day-he finally gave up and hasn't lined up chairs since. (Yes, he still lines up small things from time to time.)
Sometimes we can behave like my son and constantly want to line up the chairs when they could bless our lives if we use them the way God intended. He loves us and wants to obey Him so that life will go well for us. Like a parent to a child. Col. 3:20 ; Titus 2:11-14; Titus 2:1-2.
Just a few days ago, in the early morning hour, in the midst of dozing and falling into a deep sleep, I was reminded of a difficult time in my son's behavior. It was after his diagnosis and before he officially started school. It started small. He would consistently line things up. He seemed to be searching for some type of order. Then it moved on to him lining up two or three of our dining room chairs. Soon he was lining up all of our dining room chairs, and before we knew it, he was lining up every single chair in our home down the center of the house! After learning how to teach him through behavior therapy, I knew what I had to do. I needed to be strong and not allow the lining up. Any time he would move a chair away from it's original spot, I would immediately put it back, without a word. At first, he would laugh nervously. After some time, when he realized that I was going to continue putting chairs back, he started to cry and whine. After a month and a half of this-every day, several times a day-he finally gave up and hasn't lined up chairs since. (Yes, he still lines up small things from time to time.)
Sometimes we can behave like my son and constantly want to line up the chairs when they could bless our lives if we use them the way God intended. He loves us and wants to obey Him so that life will go well for us. Like a parent to a child. Col. 3:20 ; Titus 2:11-14; Titus 2:1-2.
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